We’ve Gotta Talk About Sex!
Honest, fact-based, comprehensive, developmentally appropriate, inclusive conversation about healthy sexuality
On this World AIDS Day, AHF and more than 40 AHF country teams will hold commemorative events to honor all who have lost their lives to AIDS-related illnesses and support those who carry on the fight.
Read MoreTrans Parent Day is an annual event established in 2009 that honors both transgender parents and parents who have trans children. It always falls on the first Sunday of the month. We just celebrated on Sunday, November 3. According to a new study by the Williams Institute at UCLA School of Law (2020), an estimated 19% of transgender adults in the U.S. are parents.
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various contraceptives
By Emmalinda MacLean & Dr. Allie Melendez
September is Sexual Health Awareness Month—a theme that feels especially significant to us at More Than Sex-Ed. Our work is all about nurturing healthy development through “open, honest conversations about sex.” This new month energizes us to redefine sexual health education, address myths and misinformation, and help connect people to the tools and resources they need to take care of their own bodies!
In our classes with students, and workshops with parents and caregivers, we’ve seen firsthand how open, honest conversations can change lives. Sexual health isn’t just about avoiding diseases or unplanned pregnancies—it’s about understanding our bodies, feeling comfortable with who we are, and building relationships grounded in trust and mutual respect.
We know these conversations aren’t always easy. Many of us grew up in environments where talking about sex was awkward, even taboo. Without honest dialogue, we’re left with confusion, anxiety, and sometimes, risky behaviors. By encouraging open and straightforward discussions regarding sexual health, we help young people dismantle the taboos that prevent many from seeking out the facts and making informed decisions. Our workshop-based curriculum allows us to create brave spaces where students can ask questions, share their experiences, and learn from one another in an environment of trust and respect.
But knowledge and comfort alone are not enough to protect your health; people deserve access to resources, too. California law requires that middle and high school students receive information about their legal rights regarding sexual and reproductive healthcare, and guidance on how to access local resources. We make sure students know that in our state they have the right to confidential medical care if they are over 12 years old, including prevention, testing, and treatment for HIV and other STIs, as well as pregnancy-related healthcare. Minors in California even have the right to leave school for these medical appointments (with a doctor’s note), because for some teens this is the only time they can access this care without their parents’ knowledge. Some of our client schools in the past were unfamiliar with this law, so we make sure that teachers and administrators know their students’ legal rights too!
Some parents are alarmed at the thought of their child receiving medical treatment without parental consent. The heartbreaking truth, though, is that many children experience sexual abuse in their own homes, or are at risk of abuse if parents find out about their sexual behaviors. While the debate over “parents’ rights” rages across our country, and we respect that different people have different values about how to raise their children, we are grateful to live and teach in a state that knows no one has the right to abuse a child.
We regularly map out the nearest Planned Parenthood to a school before we teach there. We let students know that there is no age restriction on buying condoms and that many clinics give them away for free. Birth control and emergency contraception (the “morning-after pill”, or Plan B) are available over-the-counter. There are even at-home STI test kits, where you mail your sample into a clinic or lab and they send you back your results confidentially.
The fear that these resources will encourage or “give permission” to teens to engage in more sexual activity doesn’t stand up to the data–quite the opposite. Showing young people the range of factors that go into being responsible for your sexual health care impresses on them the weight of the decision. We regularly tell parents, guardians, and school faculty that research shows comprehensive sex-ed delays sexual debut, and increases use of protection when someone does become sexually active. Students also hear from us that the longer someone waits before becoming sexually active, the less likely they are to regret the choice.
One of the greatest challenges in sexual health education is combating the myths and misinformation that are so prevalent in our culture. From misunderstandings about contraception and STIs to harmful stereotypes about gender and sexuality, these misconceptions can have serious consequences.
Many students are shocked to learn that condoms and birth control methods all have failure rates. Others (or sometimes, the same ones) come in with internalized negative beliefs about sex that are so strong that it can be difficult for them to imagine a sexual relationship being mutually pleasurable, joyful, and fulfilling. We’ve heard students vehemently defend sexist attitudes as though they were scientific facts; Unfortunately, we know that it’s unlikely for beliefs to change simply because someone is presented with evidence against them, but we try to meet all participants with patience and compassion for wherever they are. Beliefs can change, and sometimes discussions with classmates are more impactful than anything a teacher might say; we love seeing peer pressure as a force for good.
This year, More Than Sex-Ed has been chosen as a recipient of a generous grant from the AIDS Healthcare Foundation to support our work for the 24-25 school year. This grant will allow us to educate students about the past, present, and future of HIV/AIDS prevention and treatment, and to reduce the misinformation and stigma against LGBTQ+ individuals and communities.
We are so excited that The AIDS Healthcare Foundation grant will allow us to expand our outreach to more communities across Los Angeles and to enhance our workshops with updated curricula in which all students feel represented, respected, informed, and empowered in their sexual health decision-making.
While we love that Sexual Health Awareness Month coincides with back-to-school season, our commitment to promoting sexual health through open dialogue continues year-round, and we invite you to join us in our efforts.
Whether you're a parent looking to start a conversation with your child, an educator seeking resources for your students, or an individual wanting to learn more about your sexual health, More Than Sex-Ed is here to support you. Together, we can create a culture where everyone feels empowered to talk about sex openly, honestly, and without fear.
This September, all of us at More Than Sex-Ed invite you to challenge the myths, reduce the stigma, and empower ourselves and others with the knowledge and confidence to make informed choices. After all, sexual health is MORE THAN just sex—it's about living the happy, healthy, fulfilling lives all of us deserve.
How schools teach sexuality has changed a lot since I was a kid; today, More Than Sex-Ed helps schools make sure that when students learn about bodies, about puberty, about healthy relationships, about love—we make sure that those lessons include and respect everybody. How cities celebrate pride has changed; how people understand what it means to be lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, or queer has changed. But let’s be clear, that’s not because being LGBTQ is a new thing: gay and trans people have existed for as long as humans have existed.
Read MoreSo the short answer has to start with,”How do you define having sex?” Sex encompasses the physical activity between people that involves touching each other’s genitals. That touching can happen in many different ways including genital to genital, anus or mouth, as well as fingers and even objects. All of these can lead to the transmission of an STI or sexually transmitted infection, so let’s define that while we are at it. An STI results from the exchange of infected bodily fluids or skin cells. Bodily fluids including semen as well as pre-ejaculate, vaginal fluids and blood. Other STIs can be passed to partners via skin to skin contact with an infected body area.
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Read MoreA glossary of slang we’ve gotten from students recently
One of the joys of teaching is how much you learn from your students, and sex-ed class is a great place for a rich vocabulary exchange. Sometimes they’re testing us; sometimes it’s to make their classmates laugh. Fortunately urbandictionary.com provides a wealth of resources for cracking the code and showing the youths that yeah, we know a thing or two. Read on for some of the new terms we’ve seen most often in the past few months–mostly from 7th, 8th, and 9th graders–and the “teachable moments” they’ve offered.
Read MoreHelping Survivors* is an organization on a mission to help heal, educate, and empower people who have been impacted by sexual assault and abuse. They have provided us with a really important resource addressing the difficult topic of child sexual abuse.
Key Takeaways
While child sexual abuse can happen to anyone and be perpetrated by anyone, it often occurs with someone the child knows and can take many forms
Child sexual abuse often occurs after building trust or grooming a child and the abuse can span over years, often starting subtly
Survivors of childhood sexual abuse have rights and options, and many states are lifting or expanding the statute of limitations
How to Talk With Your Kids About Porn is a book all of us should read. Although the term “porn”, referring to pornography, is in the title…and we do learn a lot about the current state of porn…the most important takeaway from this book is its emphasis on the need for communicating with young people. This is a book that’s accessible, non-judgmental, inclusive and fun to read. It offers a how-to format that guides us step-by-step toward becoming better communicators about sex, sexuality, media literacy and porn, describing different ages and stages and the topics and approaches that work best at each age. It helps us think, broadly, about online safety and general sex education while honing in on the topic of porn.
Read MoreLet’s get our kids vaccinated and prevent HPV related cancers!
There are quite a few reasons why and here are some very important HPV facts:
Absolutely every single human being is at risk of becoming infected with HPV. Studies show that 85% of people will get an HPV infection in their lifetime.
The prospect of a high-risk HPV infection progressing to cancer is about 10%, even though about half of HPV infections are from high-risk strains.
There are approximately 13 million Americans infected with HPV annually.
HPV is spread by close skin to skin contact or touching during vaginal, anal and oral sex.
A person can get HPV when their vulva, vagina, cervix, penis or anus is touching another person’s genitals, mouth or throat.
The virus is spread by the skin to skin contact itself, which means that the sharing of bodily fluids is not necessary for transmission.
This virus can also be spread when an infected person has no known or visible signs or symptoms of active HPV.
It is impossible to track the exact time of exposure to HPV, especially because a person can be infected with more than one strain at a time.
Most people will clear a strain of HPV in about 2 years, but it is not known how long a person can pass a strain on to others within that 2-year time frame.
Let’s face it, not many people really want to talk about the smell of a vagina. Yet it is, after all, just another body part that deserves to be talked about. So here we go! The vagina has many different smells that can indicate a wide range of conditions; which could be healthy, or require evaluation and treatment, or signal different stages in our lives, or are affected by what we consume, the activities we engage in, and even our hygiene practices. It is essential to normalize open dialogue about the vagina and its composition, just like we talk about our mouths, noses, ears and other body parts without embarrassment.
Read MoreOur new volunteer team member, Dr. Joanna Palmieri, she/her, is a dedicated Obstetrician/Gynecologist bringing a wealth of experience and compassion to her work in the medical field.
Read MoreIt’s a rough time to be transgender (trans) in the US. It’s not that it hasn’t been before, but these last few years have made it particularly difficult (especially if you live in a “red state,” and even more especially if you’re under 18). Trans rights, and queer rights in general, are under attack to an alarming degree. More than 500 bills targeting the rights of LGBTQIA+ people were introduced in 2023. And seeing the direction things have been going, there’s so much at stake for queer rights in 2024.
So much of this recent wave of trans panic stems from disinformation about trans and queer people.
I love what I do. I’m grateful every day to have meaningful work that I know benefits young
people, even when it’s hard. Sometimes it can be challenging to have such a short amount of
time with a class; relationship building is immeasurably valuable to education, and we often
don’t get to know the students the same way their regular teachers do. But it’s beautiful to see
the impact we can have, even with just a few sessions, and to know that those messages will
last for years—even decades—after we’ve left their campus. Here’s a short list of some recent
highlights from the classroom:
Read MoreWe help children develop an understanding of autonomy so that they recognize that they are unique, independent and capable.
Children have a right to live free from physical acts, such as touch, to which they do not consent. And to reinforce the right to bodily autonomy in all the spaces that children exist, we make it clear to the parents, caregivers and educators that bodily autonomy requires respecting boundaries, affirmative consent, and self-defined personal comfort with affectionate touch.
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Please join us for a donation yoga class benefitting More Than Sex-Ed on Saturday, November 18th. The class will be from 2-3pm, and after from 3-3:30pm please join us for complimentary tea and cookies. This yoga class is open level, meaning everyone is welcome and encouraged to come, whether this is your 1st class or 100th class. The class will be contact-free (unless consented) and focused on loving connection of mind, breath, and body. We encourage you to bring your own yoga mat if you have one, or you are welcome to borrow one at the studio.
The class will be taught by Advisory Board Member and certified yoga instructor Alix Kelsey. You can read more about her practice and teaching style here:
We hope to see you there!
Just a couple of weeks ago, I got the chance to take part in a virtual conference hosted by AMAZE, and have nothing but positive things to report back.
For example, in a breakout session, we were given some valuable tools by Jess McIntosh when it comes to defending against disinformation. Jess guided us through building your message to support your values for your sex ed curriculum in the face of adversity.
I am feeling equipped with lots helpful resources and am thankful to the AMAZE team for organizing such an awesome event.
We at More Than Sex-Ed enthusiastically plant the seeds that start conversations about sexuality. We work in partnership with young people and the adults who support them in order to nurture a healthy start in which relationships can grow and thrive.
When we started in 2015, we were a small organization providing sex education for youngsters in just a few middle schools, and that effort has now bloomed with programming in over 45 schools in pre-K through12th grade!
We are grateful for your support in our growth.
Our impact has been unmistakable and the numbers speak for themselves.
#GivingTuesday is a global generosity movement, unleashing the power of people and organizations to transform their communities and the world.
October is “Talk with your kids” month, and we encourage you to consider the wide number of intersecting topics that affect our understanding of human sexuality, and how we communicate these complexities to our children.
In order to be comprehensive, sex education needs to cover many, many subjects, but we can’t do it all at once. And it’s okay to focus on one thing at a time. A focus is not an exclusion. Just because we might be thinking and learning about Intersex Awareness issues on Oct 26, for example, doesn’t mean we can’t make connections between intersex identities and what we know, or want to learn, about mental health, or periods, or vasectomies, or AIDS, or menopause.
read on for a list of awareness days in the month of October that could inspire a conversation:
Since its debut in September 2016, AMAZE has published well over a hundred educational videos on topics including puberty, gender identity and expression, pregnancy and reproduction, healthy relationships, STIs and HIV, sexual orientation, and personal safety, to its YouTube channel and website.
To reach youth, educators, and parents, Amaze content is published on five social media platforms: YouTube, Facebook, Snapchat, Instagram, and Twitter.
Parents and caregivers can preview every video and curate a playlist of videos they want to share with their kids. It really is an incredible resource!
Check out this series for parents and caregivers on “having the talks”. https://amaze.org/having-the-talks/
Wendy Sellers, sexual health educator, founder of Health4Hire, Inc., and author of Puberty: the Wonder Years recently chatted with our very own Emmalinda MacLean about the challenges of teaching puberty education. We are delighted to see Emmalinda receiving the recognition she deserves for her outstanding work as an educator.
Read more here: https://pubertycurriculum.com/educator-spotlight-emmalinda-maclean/
MORE THAN SEX-ED is an educational outreach initiative. Our goal is to partner with groups in our community who already serve youth, in order to create and implement sexuality education programs based on guidelines set by the Sexuality Information Education Council of the United States.
a Los Angeles area non-profit project of
Mailing address:
7439 La Palma Ave, Box #265
Buena Park, CA 90620
Community Partners EIN: 95-4302067
